SCRUPULOSITY – RELIGIOUS OCD

If you had asked me, two years ago, “what is OCD?” I may or may not have remembered that it stood for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder but I had heard about those who have a disorder where they wash their hands excessively and probably would have thought of that. I would also have been aware of some who were obsessive about being organized, only because I have a co-worker who is meticulously organized and when I complimented her on that she answered, “Oh that’s my OCD.” So the sum total of my knowledge of OCD would probably have been its full name, excessive hand washing and being super-organized.

Little did I know that there is a lot more to OCD. In fact there is a whole world of different kinds of OCD. OCD itself is a condition of reoccurring obsessions and compulsive behaviours that stem from anxiety and negative thinking that has been internalized, suppressed and then expressed in numerous reoccurring intrusive thoughts and compulsions. This is what I have learned.

When a good friend of mine announced that she was writing her Master’s Thesis, I asked her “On what topic?” She wrote on a “Biblical and holistic approach to obsessive-compulsive disorder.” I said “That would be interesting, may I read it?” So the day came for me to read it and as I did, I came across some uncomfortable truths. As this thesis laid out example after example of symptoms of OCD I could not help but see myself to some degree in what was being described. I have since read and listened to more from other sources. Whether or not I have OCD, this has led to a lot of self analysis regarding my own mental health.

The possibility of it came as a shock. It’s not like I didn’t know that I have inner struggles. I knew that I do, but I never really understood it and I never knew how to explain it. Although there were times over the years when I attempted to explain some of my struggles with particular persons that I trusted and respected, it didn’t really result in any big change or breakthrough.

OCD is a serious and stressful topic. It is unwanted. It involves a barrage of unwanted intrusive thoughts that flood the mind. And the worst kind of OCD is ROCD (Religious Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) also called Scrupulosity.

This is where the sufferer has intrusive thoughts that are strongly contrary to their own sacred and cherished beliefs and these thoughts are not easy to dismiss. Instead the sufferer worries about these thoughts, internalizes these thoughts, thinks that these thoughts are a reflection of themselves and represses these thoughts, only to find them resurfacing again and again, developing into a pattern of thinking. The sufferer then develops compulsive behaviours that on a subconscious level seem to help a little, but in reality, don’t really bring about the kind of change that they are seeking.

I don’t necessarily have OCD. My tendencies don’t necessarily rise to the level of an OCD condition that would justify medication or other treatment. I have never been diagnosed and I don’t care to be. Nor do I have the most severe symptoms that most people associate with OCD, when they think of this condition. In fact there is a wide spectrum of degrees of ROCD. This should not be surprising because really all OCD is, is poorly processed stress and anxiety that affects our thinking in negative ways. Who is there out there who has never battled stress and anxiety? We all have. And we have all probably had “OCD moments” whether we recognized it or not. For some however, their OCD is not just an OCD moment but rather an OCD condition. There is a wide spectrum of those whose mental health is partially affected to those who are deeply affected. I am somewhere on this spectrum.

How do you measure OCD? Now that I have studied this, I have seen things like The Yale-Brown Obsessive Compulsive Scale that attempts to measure degrees of OCD. I find its questions difficult to answer and I prefer not to try to measure my own mental health. I know from reading the stories of others that there are worse cases than my own out there. Having said that, I have experienced a degree of intrusive thoughts and anxiety. It is sufficient for me to recognize that whatever degree I am at, I am somewhere on the spectrum and that I am ready to, with the help of God, start working on improving my mental health.

What was initially shock has actually shifted to hope in now recognizing that a lot can be done to improve a person’s mental health. After reading my friend’s thesis, I continued on researching this deeper for myself, reading and listening to many sources and analyzing this information, again for myself.

As a result of my study and of my self reflection, I have come to some conclusions, as well as charting a course for my mental health improvement. I want to say upfront that I am not a psychologist, counsellor or medical practitioner of any kind and that I disclaim any liability for anything said here. Please don’t take any of this as my advice for you. I am not in a place to give any professional advice. The purpose for this piece of writing is to tell my story, to put to words my own wrestling with this issue, to share the conclusions I have come to and to lay out a path for my mental health improvement. As a reader, if you see something for yourself and for your journey contained herein then use it as you wish.

I also want to say that I am keenly aware of the tension between a purely spiritual, power-encounter approach to deliverance from mental struggles and a purely secular psychological approach to the same. I have now come to see mental health as a balance of both the spiritual and the psychological. There is a significant tension between the two, only because people drift to the extremes of either side. What you believe about ROCD Scrupulosity will affect how you see many other related issues such as sanctification, holiness, human agency and grace. I personally come from a Pentecostal, holiness, revival-appreciating background and I love that background. As I have been reading about ROCD I have had to wrestle with these issues, make certain readjustments to my thinking and as a result have landed somewhere in the middle in this spiritual vs psychological tension, now spiritual/psychological blended position.

Landing in the middle means that I don’t accept everything I have read coming from a overly psychological perspective. Quite frankly I am shocked to read professing Christian Psychologists speak favourably of practising yoga and even transcendental meditation as part of OCD treatment. I definitely am not advocating these. Standard treatment such as Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) can also be questionable, depending on how it is used. In ERP, the OCD patient has his compulsions stimulated by a psychologist who is intentionally provoking disturbing intrusive thoughts so that the psychologist can then teach the OCD patient to under-react to those thoughts. I am not saying that this is out-and-out wrong but I have read of examples of this that, for myself, would cross the line of what I could accept and go along with, if I was their patient. I also strongly disagree with Christian psychologists who recommend secular non-Christian Psychologists for treating scrupulosity. To do so is to treat scrupulosity as a solely psychological condition that doesn’t require addressing a spiritual dimension at all. Such an outlook is why there is reaction against psychology among many leaders in the church. Maybe if your OCD is obsessive hand-washing a secular psychologist can help you with that, but if your OCD is ROCD scrupulosity, how is a secular non-Christian who has never entered into the spiritual dimension of redemption, conversion, sanctification and grace going to understand and help a Christian at all of the points of their struggle where these things converge? ROCD scrupulosity is a combination of the spiritual and the psychological. I am starting to think that becoming free of OCD, involves a combination of spiritual and psychological help.

This writing is my struggle put to print. I don’t know if you are like me, but writing actually helps me process a topic. In my journey thus-far, I have had to weigh some deep matters of the soul. I have said that in my wrestling I have had to make certain readjustments to my thinking. In what areas? Mostly in the areas of becoming more accepting of God’s grace for me, seeing Him more as my loving Heavenly Father, becoming more kind to myself, becoming less judgmental, taking somewhat less responsibility for all of the outcomes of life and how I interpret temptation towards sin vs participation in sin.

That last one is a big one and over the course of this writing I will unpack it more along with many other aspects of my struggle, my learning and my re-learning. At this point, I want to say again that I have landed in the middle. I still believe in and cherish sanctification, holiness, revival, separation from the world and all of the spiritual disciplines of the Christian life. After studying a phycological approach to scrupulosity, it would be easy to over-emphasize the cognitive aspects to this struggle and run in a direction that minimizes personal responsibility in a hyper-grace kind of way. That is not what I am advocating. Nor am I endorsing any psychologist just because I may quote them along the way. If I quote anyone, I am doing it very selectively, to make a specific point, not to give a personal endorsement of their work as a whole.

I want to say a bit more about degrees of OCD. There is a spectrum of greater and lesser OCD. If you are reading this because you can relate, on some level, to these struggles, then how bad is your OCD? I personally don’t want a professional diagnosis, personal counselling or medication. However, I am digging into my Bible, reading extensively on the topic of scrupulosity, listening to podcasts, making changes to the way I think and working out a plan for my own mental health. That plan essentially involves soaking my mind in healing scripture, intentionally becoming more accepting of God’s grace, going easier on myself than I have been previously, praying for healing from God, intentionally doing what I can to decrease my stress levels and as best I can, ignore unwanted intrusive thoughts. I will unpack this more. I am already seeing positive change, but I haven’t arrived at the end. This is still a journey. I have many years of thinking in the opposite direction that I am gradually undoing.

Friend and fellow journeyer, how is it for you? Are you seeking help from God and with His help embarking on some self-treatment? If you have it, what is your level of OCD? I have read the stories of some people where their intrusive thoughts are so vivid and so intense that, although unreal, to the sufferer, it is nearly impossible to separate them from reality. If this is you, then you are at the far end of the spectrum and need extra help. Do you suffer from deep depression, chronic anxiety and panic attacks? Are you suicidal? If you are at the far end of this spectrum – get help, I would say, in the form of a professional Christian counsellor.

At this early stage of the journey I would like to put out some definitions and descriptions of scrupulosity ROCD. After that I will talk about aspects of scrupulosity, OCD, mental health and my journey. A Biblical, scriptural worldview will be laced throughout and applied to my mental health journey.

I would describe scrupulosity ROCD as fearful thought patterns of anxiety combined with stress, depression and a harsh attitude towards oneself that begins as unwanted intrusive thoughts that we meditate on, internalize and suppress only to find these thoughts resurfacing in our minds.The content of these thoughts are blasphemous, and contrary to our sacred beliefs and cherished values. They also reflect doubt and unbelief.There is emotion attached to them. Because they are so contrary to what is most important to us, and to who we are, they provoke a strong inner reaction in the form of grief, anxiety, frustration and depression. They also provoke some kind of compulsion or compulsive behaviour, in the case of scrupulosity, usually repetitive confession. This experience re-occurs and before long becomes a pattern of thought.

The Apostolic Christian Counselling & Family Services (ACCFS) describe scrupulosity ROCD as a subcategory of OCD in which “OCD wraps around matters of faith and morality leading to distress and interference in one’s spiritual life and practices.”13 (OCD and Scrupulosity,” Apostolic Christian Counselling & Family Services [ACCFS], 2019, https://accounseling.org/ocd-and-scrupulosity/).

Mark Dejesus describes it this way;

“Religious OCD is often referred to as scrupulosity, a pathological and irrational guilt and shame around religious subjects, which drives a person to fixate over sin issues, weakness or moral shortcomings. Those under scrupulosity develop compulsive behaviours they feel they need to practice, with the hopes it will bring spiritual and emotional relief and peace.”(Mark Dejesus The OCD Healing Journey, pg 28)

Religious OCD begins with doubts in the mind concerning God’s love for oneself. Although we give mental assent to the fact that God loves us, our personal experience of this, or perhaps I should say, our personal awareness of this truth is shallow. Consequently we develop a fear-based, guilt-based and performance-based relationship with God. This doesn’t happen overnight but gradually and without knowing it we are walking down the path of religious OCD and potentially developing a scrupulosity condition. This negative focus creates distortions that become patterns of thought. Those patterns of thought begin to develop a life of their own and reoccur with greater frequency as scrupulosity develops.

As scrupulosity develops, we begin to associate fear, shame and guilt with the voice of God. That is not to say that God doesn’t use conviction to bring correction to us, He does. However, He balances it with love in a constructive way. However, for those of us who have stumbled into scrupulosity we begin to obsess over fear, shame and guilt and, if we let it, our relationship with God begins to be characterized by these things. We need to gain a better understanding of the balance between love and conviction, grace and correction, acceptance with God and the fear of the Lord, grace and growth in righteousness. The challenge for every Christian is to understand these things and to hold them in proper balance as we develop a healthy relationship with God.

In the church setting, scrupulosity is not necessarily noticed as a distortion. Those battling scrupulosity are usually viewed as being the most devoted, most serious, most dedicated and best examples of steadfastness in their faith. Yet below the surface, there is a fear-based, performance-based, guilt-based motivation that is off-centre from where it should be and that is incomplete in the areas of love, grace, trusting in God and the fruit of the Spirit.

If we are not careful, we can become just like a pharisee in our outward expression of our faith, while our inward heart is missing or deficient in core foundational elements to healthy Christian faith. I am not judging anyone. This is my struggle, but I know that I am not alone. It is not easy to get this balance right. I have been off-centre. I now believe that God has great grace for all of us who are trying to get this balance right.

What are some other characteristics of scrupulosity? “Doing what is right” becomes warped into an unforgiving perfectionism. There is a lack of depth to the foundational pillars of love and grace, that is God’s love and grace for us and then our love and grace for others. We start to prefer law over grace and develop a strong punishment-based view of God. This is not growth in the right direction. Perfectionism is not good. It is the idea that we can master everything in our spiritual life, our natural life and in the world around us and this is not realistic. The good news is that we can un-learn, re-learn and grow in a healthy direction moving forward. God’s word will help us with this. In the latter part of this writing we will take a deeper dive into healing scripture that will help us refocus.

One very important aspect of OCD that we must understand is the role of “intrusive thoughts.” These are disturbing, unwanted thoughts that pop into our minds. They are shocking to us because they are contrary to everything that we value, cherish and esteem. Where do they come from? Are they an expression of who we are? Again there are not really any easy, black and white, concrete, completely yes or no answers to these kinds of questions. Could intrusive thoughts rise out of our own sinful flesh? Sure they could and no doubt, sometimes do. Could intrusive thoughts be demonically induced. Sure they could and no doubt in some cases are. Could intrusive thoughts be imputed into our minds by other stimulus around us? Certainly and in many cases are. Could intrusive thoughts be a function of the human brain in which thoughts that have made an impression on us previously (in a negative way) are automatically re-played? Intrusive thoughts can be and sometimes are, any and all of these things. The next questions for us to ask are how should we view them and what should we do with them?

Lets first consider a wrong response to intrusive thoughts. A wrong response is to view all intrusive thoughts whether they rise out of our flesh, are demonic, from the world around us or our brain in re-play mode, to view all of it as an expression of our heart. I am not saying that it is not possible for us to sin with our minds. We all know that we can. But to view all intrusive thoughts as being “us” will generate an extreme frustration and a sense of failure and hopelessness which is not what we need.

There is a fine line to all of this. In explaining one aspect to this struggle, we must not discount another equally true aspect that although it doesn’t contradict, is held somewhat in tension. There are choices for us to make and that we do make, in either thinking righteously or thinking sinfully. However, an “intrusive thought” is just that, it is “intrusive.” It popped into our head. Now how do we view it and what do we do with it?

For help in understanding this I want to look at that great passage of scripture, Romans 7:14-25. In this passage the Apostle Paul openly shares about his own inward struggle with sin, his mind, preforming what is good and his will. This is the Apostle Paul, the author of most of the books of the new testament. He had a great struggle. This passage of scripture has been analyzed, wrestled with, debated by great theologians throughout the ages. It doesn’t necessarily fit neat and tidy into everyone’s theology. I even heard a holiness preacher explain it away, as Paul commenting on his experience before he got saved. I cannot accept such an interpretation. If that were the case, why then does Paul write in the present tense? No, Paul is talking about his inward struggle, as a Christian.

I take comfort in these words. It is like “Phew, its not just me.” Lets look at them, remembering to be careful and that there is always a fine line to all of these things. When we see a truth, it is always possible to then swing the whole pendulum radically in that direction and then over-shoot. There is a fine line to living a holy life and to embracing our inward struggle.

Paul says;

14 For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin.

15 For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.

16 If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good.

17 Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.

19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.

20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.

22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:

23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.

24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?

25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.

Phew, its not just me. Within these words can we find support for the idea that some of our intrusive thoughts rise out of our own sinful flesh? I think so:

For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.

(vs 18)

Within these words can we find support for the idea that some of our intrusive thoughts are not us? Again I think so:

Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.

(vs 17)

At what point is our dark side; “…no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.” (vs 16) I am not going to pretend that I understand this fully. I have no dogma to teach you. But would it not seem reasonable that at the level of “intrusive thought” that it is “no more I.” In other words an intrusive thought popping into my mind came from the outside and is not me.

O wretched man that I am! But some of my wretchedness is “no more I” but is an intrusive thought popping into my head. Now what am I going to do with it?

Fact: Everyone gets intrusive thoughts. Some of us get more than others. Most people ignore their intrusive thoughts and keep on thinking. However, some of us are deeply shocked by negative intrusive thoughts. That shock causes these thoughts to imbed in our thinking. In other words, the shock-value of our intrusive thoughts directly correlates with the affect that they have upon us. Shocking, disturbing intrusive thoughts make an impression on us and anything that makes an impression on us is noted by our subconscious mind only to be re-played at a later time. This is a natural function of our human brain.

The “O” in OCD is what Psychologists call obsessions. The “C” in OCD stands for “Compulsive.” Compulsions are the response that those of us make to our obsessive thoughts. Obsessions are followed by a behaviour or activity of some kind. We tell ourselves, “If I do this, it will make it better.” Before long we don’t even tell ourselves we just do our compulsions in a knee-jerk reactive way.

Compulsions can take many forms. They may include checking and re-checking, cleaning and re-cleaning, repetitive, excessive apologizing, seeking assurance and many other things. One compulsion can be obsessive confession. We interpret all of our intrusive thoughts as being our own sinful self and are confessing to God all day long. It becomes exhausting. Is this what God intended?

I have come to the conclusion that this is not what God intended. I have come to the conclusion that confession is good and is a part of the Christian life but that there is a balance to confession just like there is a balance to every area of the Christian life.

I can’t help but reflect on things that may have fed my out-of-balanced thinking relating to obsessive confession. Ever heard a fiery preacher shout “Keep short accounts with God!” What did you take that to mean? I know what I understood it to mean and that is do frequent confessing and repenting all-day long. As I sincerely embarked on trying to live this way, I fell into a scrupulosity way of thinking. There must be a better way.

So now I am doing something different. I am making a change. In the mornings when I get up I pray the Lord’s prayer, which includes “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” (Matthew 6:12) I also ask God, my Heavenly Father, to break my OCD and to wash away any personal sin, both the deeds and the affects. Then I go about my day and try to ignore my intrusive thoughts rather than personalizing and confessing them all day long. I am not saying that I never confess anything to God throughout the day. I still do, but I have reduced it. This change has cleared away a whole lot of space in my head and in my thinking and I feel a lot better. I am so glad that God’s mercies are new every morning (see Lamentations 3:22-23).

Obsessions and compulsions rob us of head space that we need to think clearly. They interfere with us being present in the moment. They put us in a place of mental fog. Overcoming them involves recognizing an intrusive thought for what it is, choose not to be shocked-out by it, but instead, ignore it and then resist the natural urge to engage in compulsive behaviour. This is the pathway to breaking OCD.

The pathway to breaking OCD is a journey. It won’t happen overnight. You can’t cast the demon of OCD out of someone and then they are free in under one minute. OCD is not a demon. OCD is a pattern of entrenched wrong-thinking that must now be reversed with right-thinking. Someone might say, “I tried to get healed and free and it didn’t work.” Yes but you are still alive, right? This is a life-long journey. This takes time. My journey is still in process. I have not arrived. So grab a walking staff and let’s to this one step at a time. However long it takes is the right amount of time for us to learn and for us to arrive at our destiny.

OCD is over-thinking. An intrusive thought pops into our head. What do we do with that thought. We could analyze it, personalize it, meditate on it or ruminate on it. There is another option. We could ignore it. We could treat it like it is a ship that is floating on by and just let it go in and out of our mind without being distracted by it. I know it is easier said than done. By letting it just drift on by, we by-step the shock impression function of our human mind and it is less likely to be replayed than if we sound a red alarm over it.

Letting an intrusive thought drift on by without giving it too much attention is the same as what psychologists call “starving a thought.” You starve that thought of any shock value and then the thought becomes less impactful. There seems to be a consensus among psychologists that OCD usually develops when we assign too much importance to an intrusive thought.

We may not be able to stop an intrusive thought from entering our mind, but we can dial-down the volume of that thought by not over-reacting to it by over-thinking. Again, dwelling on the thought is overthinking.

I am convinced that some of our headaches stem from us thinking too hard. Our brains are overloaded and a little sore from overuse. Scrupulosity leads to chronic introspection which ironically is a form of self-obsession. Friend is all of our introspection producing good fruit? For me it has produced some of the kind of fruit that I could do without.

I am choosing to get out of my head. I have spent way too much time in there looking around and not liking what I found. I am getting out of my head and into life. This is better.

There is an irrational nature to OCD. Obsessions are irrational. Compulsions are equally irrational. I remember listening to Mark Dejesus read the letter of a man who had a bad case of OCD. He would imagine an emergency situation in which a supposedly deadly contaminant would spill out onto the floor of a particular place. This became his obsession as he would imagine this emergency reoccurring again and again, wherever he went. He then developed a compulsion in which he would go to the place where he imagined the spill occurring and he would imagine a cleaning device, cleaning up the spill. He then developed a heightened sense of responsibility believing that he was responsible to clean up all of these spills. This is mental illness. This is OCD. Both the obsession and the compulsion are unreal and irrational. Yet to him, the experience was so intense that he could not separate the imaginary from reality.

The above case is full-blown OCD. However, there are many of us that don’t have this but still have unwanted intrusive thoughts. I pray to God about this and am intentionally trying to ignore my intrusive thoughts.

This has been a painful experience and continues to be as I am journeying. It leaves me feeling broken. What does God do with the broken? I take hope from His word;

A bruised reed He will not break,
And smoking flax He will not quench,
Till He sends forth justice to victory;

(Matthew 12:20 NKJ)

In ancient Israel reeds were sometimes used to make musical instruments. If in the process of transforming it into an instrument, it became bruised, it would simply be broken and thrown away. This is not what God does with us. We are living reeds that get bruised in the making but He will not discard us in this way. We are all bruised reeds.The disfigured man whom Jesus met in Matthew 12 was a bruised reed, The woman taken in adultery was a bruised reed in John 8, Jairus was a bruised reed as he mourned his daughter’s death, The woman with the issue of blood in Luke 8 was a bruised reed. After his denial of the Lord, the disciple Peter was a bruised reed. Every one of these was shown grace and mercy by Jesus. Then, for us, Jesus became a bruised reed. (https://www.gotquestions.org/bruised-reed-not-break.html)

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

(Isaiah 53:5)

What about emotions? This would be easier if I could just turn those off. However, these intrusive thoughts have emotion attached to them. This also amplifies the shock value of those intrusive thoughts. How am I doing at processing things like disappointment or rejection? I am not sure, but I know that Jesus cares about our feelings too. After all He said that The Spirit of the Lord; “…hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted,…” (Luke 4:18) Prayer: Lord Jesus we welcome that healing. I love the Psalms, but can I dare to ask, are you sometimes made a little uncomfortable by some of David’s very strong statements that he makes as he seems to swing back and forth from extreme joy, to deep sorrow, to anger and then back to praise? There must have been a reason for him to gush all of that out on parchment and then have it preserved in our Bibles. There must also be a reason for us to gush out our emotions and let them pass on through, perhaps in a similar way to how we should let our intrusive thoughts pass on by. Perhaps this is one thing that makes us human and distinguishes us from stoics. I am still wrestling with this one.

What about medication? In my reading and research I have certainly come across the opinion of more than one psychologist who advocates taking medication for OCD.

I am not going to say that it is wrong to do so, but rather, I don’t want to go that route myself. I don’t feel like I need to. And even if I did, like many others I don’t want any side effects. You never know how your body will react to medication and it can become a slippery slope of treating the illness with medication and then treating the side effects with more medication and then treating the side effects of the side effects with even more medication. I don’t want to go down that road personally, but if you are struggling with OCD, you will have to make that decision for yourself. I am not offering advice on that. However, if you do go that route please realize that medication treats symptoms not root causes. If you think that you can simply pop a pill and be cured just as fast, you are going to be disappointed. Healing from OCD and especially from scrupulosity is a journey that will take time. We got into this mess by wrong thinking, but the good news is that we can reverse our thinking, ignore intrusive thoughts, intentionally disengage from compulsions and start clawing our way back to a place of wholeness.

Ever feel like you are the only one having these struggles. Did you know that there were many great Christian leaders in the past that had their own struggles with scrupulosity? Leaders like John Bunyan and Martin Luther expressed tremendous inner struggles in this same area. There are repeated accounts of it. In the old days they didn’t call it scrupulosity. Seventeenth century clergyman John Moore referred to it as “Religious Melancholy,” but it was text book scrupulosity that he was describing. Remember the Apostle Paul sharing with us his great inward struggle. OCD is both in the world and in the Church. It is in the pew and in the pulpit too. Countless people have it without realizing it, or at least, something is wrong but I can’t put a finger on it or explain it, until now. Reader, how about you?

As part of our mental health journey we are going to need to slow down. This will take some clearing up of head-space and life space. One of our problems is that we are too busy. We are like hamsters running furiously on a hamster-wheel. Before long there is smoke coming out of the ears of that hamster as he runs faster and faster. This is a picture of us and this is not helping our mental health. Sometimes we just have to take a flying leap off of the hamster-wheel, land in a slow place and start working through our healing journey. I know that is easier said than done. I have definitely taken steps in this direction but I haven’t completely achieved this.

There are other practical steps that will help us on this journey. Eating healthy food, getting plenty of sleep, getting exercise – all of these things contribute to our mental health and to our overall well-being.

Take a moment and ponder the following deep thought expressed by Michael R. Emlet;

“We were never designed as human beings to carry the full weight of our well-being. We are creatures, not the Creator.”

(Emelet Scrupulosity when Doubts Devour, pg 19)

Whoa that’s deep. What that is really saying is that to gain and maintain mental health, we need God. We can’t do this or figure it out by ourselves. We need to pray and ask God to help us unlearn, re-learn and follow Him. This involves God nurturing us back to health. A big part of receiving that nurture is reading His healing word. Reading, receiving and believing it will bring us to a place of mental health. We were never meant to live wordless lives. We read; “ And Jesus answered him, saying, It is written, That man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word of God.” (Luke 4:4) We are quickly coming to that point in this writing, that is, seeing what God’s word has to say to us, Christ followers, His children. By renewing our minds to His healing word we will experience transformation.

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Romans 12:2

Before we do, or as we do, go deep into God’s word, what is this mental health that we are seeking? I think a good picture of it is the fruit of God’s Spirit. We read;

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

(Galatians 5:22-23)

Keep it simple saint. Let’s get back to the fruit of God’s Spirit. Let’s ask Him again to develop these fruit in us, in our hearts, in our lives.

Prayer: Heavenly Father would you cause the fruit of love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness and temperance to grow and flourish in me. I want these things to characterize my life. I can’t just churn these things out, but you can cause them to grow in me as I now yield to you. In Jesus name.

Reader if you are a Christian, then what spirit has God given to you. For we read;

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

(1 Timothy 1:7)

How do I receive this spirit? Let’s pray and believe;

Prayer; God you have not given me a spirit of fear. I choose to receive Your spirit of love, Your spirit of power and Your spirit of a sound mind. In Jesus’ name. Amen

Here’s another one that we will need to maintain a sound mind;

“…for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.”

(Hebrews 13:5)

Do you have a broken heart? Don’t feel bad; we all do. We are broken people, walking through a broken world, interacting with other broken people. We don’t know in ourselves how to get this right or how to give and receive love very well. Jesus will carry us on this healing journey. He can heal our hearts and give to us freedom and deliverance. This is what He does.

Jesus said;

The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised,

Luke 4:18

Prayer: Jesus and Heavenly Father, I am coming to You. I am bruised and brokenhearted so I come to You for healing, liberty and deliverance. I choose to lay down my heavy burdens.I choose to take Your hand and let you lead me.Thank you so much that You will never leave me or forsake me. I am trusting and counting on that. I am not defeated, this is all a part of my learning. You lead and I will follow. I open myself up to Your nurturing healing. In Jesus name.

Scrupulosity involves seeing God as a harsh taskmaster. It involves us relating to Him in a performance driven way, which always falls short of the ideals that we set for ourselves. It leaves us very afraid of Him. We need to correct this thinking.

I want to correct this thinking with this scripture quote;

“…God is love.” (1 John 4:8)

Let that one sink in. Selah. God is love. Love is His main characteristic. Who does He love? Is it angels, nature, creation? God’s love is shed abroad in every direction but His love for His children is on an especially deep level. Christian brother and sister you and I are objects of God’s love.

How enduring is Jesus’ love? We read;

Now before the feast of the passover, when Jesus knew that his hour was come that he should depart out of this world unto the Father, having loved his own which were in the world, he loved them unto the end.

John 13:1

This healing journey is about becoming rooted and grounded in God’s love and from that place of being grounded in love, let the overwhelming love of Christ begin to heal us.

That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,

May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height;

And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.

Ephesians 3: 17-19

What about the fear of the Lord? Are we not supposed to fear God? The scripture does refer to the fear of the Lord and holds this kind of fear up as an ideal. What does the fear of the Lord mean? To understand this we have to understand that God is holy. His holiness is an expression of his moral uprightness and His righteousness. His holiness is not just something He does but it emanates from Himself and is almost indescribable. It is something that we come to understand, in a limited way, from encountering Him in moments of faith, perhaps in a moment of prayer, perhaps in the midst of a revival or however He would choose to reveal that to us. What then is our response to encountering the holiness of God? An automatic and immediate response to such a revelation is a strong sense of reverential awe and yes, even a type of fear and trembling. However, entering into a God-ordained experience like what I just described, will not leave you with OCD. It just won’t. Everything God does to you will cause you to grow, and be blessed. But the fear of the Lord, experienced from an encounter with God is altogether different from the kind of spinning in your head over fearful thoughts that entered your mind and that you have chosen to overthink, fixate on and obsess over. The latter may lead to OCD. This other kind of fear is not helpful and actually we need for God’s love to cast it our. We read;

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

1 John4:18

Prayer: Heavenly Father I ask that Your perfect love would cast out all of my unhealthy fear. Cause me to be made perfect in love. Thank You. In Jesus name. I choose to break any agreement that I have made with unhealthy fear, including anxiety, stress, panic, phobias and worry. I renounce letting fear influence me.In fears place, cause perfect love to come flooding in. Amen

God actually wants us to draw near to Him, experience His love for us, nurture us and not be afraid. That is why we read;

Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.
Hebrews 4:16

We are to come to Him, even boldly and receive of His grace and mercy in our time of need. Isn’t this wonderful. This is still sinking in. I am learning this. I am learning.

Understanding God’s love really requires stepping out of our box and learning to think in a flip-opposite way to everything that we have learned from the world around us. God’s love is still there even when we fail. How does Jesus love His followers?

(John 13:1)

We follow a Jesus who loves us to the end. His love is there for us every day.

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

(Romans 8:38-39)

Learning to receive Gd’s love for us is an important part of forming a relationship with God. Two important questions that everyone of us at some point have wondered are “Who am I?” and “Am I loved?” (Mark Dejesus, Exposing The Rejection Mindset, pg 17) Every Christian is a child of God and is deeply loved by God.

Prayer: Heavenly Father I don’t understand Your love for me but I want to understand it and I receive it and I thank You for it.In Jesus’ name. Amen

Did you know that one thing that God does and that He considers important, is comforting His people. Jesus said to His disciples;

And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever;
(John 14:16)

In other words, as Jesus was nearing the end of His earthly ministry, one thing that Jesus put on His own to do list was to request of His Heavenly Father that his followers would have the Comforter of The Holy Spirit. He was concerned that His followers would need comforting and this was a priority to Him.

What are we supposed to do? We are to abide in Christ. “Abide in me, and I in you. …” (John 15:4) Yes but what are we to do to do the works of God?

“Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.” (John 6:29)

Abide and believe. I think we can do this. Then simply follow Him in whatever He leads you to believe and do, in a day to day way. I think that we can do this, stumble and get up as we may. I think that we can do this. Keep it simple saint.

Yes but, isn’t there work for me that I must do to earn this? Abide and believe. You could work or you could rest. Which would you rather do?

There remains therefore a rest for the people of God. For he who has entered His rest has himself also ceased from his works as God did from His.

(Hebrews 4:9-10)

Keep it simple saint. Abide and believe. Then simply follow Him in whatever He leads you to believe and do, in a day to day way. Rest. I think we can do this.

We can do this, but we still need God. We need Him and His comforting at every point in this journey. It is His grace that will refresh us and will enable us to carry on. We could spend a lifetime studying and understanding God’s grace for us and we would only be scratching the surface of this topic. The topic of His love for us is just as vast. That is why Paul says;

That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,

May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height;

And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.

(Ephesians 3:17-19)

Prayer: Heavenly Father help me to better understand Your love and acceptance of me. I want to have an ongoing experience of Your love healing and shaping my heart and life. Please give me the discernment to recognize where I have had false perceptions of You. I surrender my thoughts, my heart and my mind to You and to Your healing love.

All of this is a call to faith. Again;

“Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.” (John 6:29)

What if I don’t have enough faith? We only need a mustard-seed amount.

Another parable put he forth unto them, saying, The kingdom of heaven is like to a grain of mustard seed, which a man took, and sowed in his field:

Which indeed is the least of all seeds: but when it is grown, it is the greatest among herbs, and becometh a tree, so that the birds of the air come and lodge in the branches thereof.

(Matthew 13:31-32)

It is okay to pray in this way;

And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.

(Mark 9:24)

It’s okay, we can pray this way too. Someone in Mark 9 did already and Jesus wasn’t upset with him. We can pray this too and He won’t be upset. Prayer: Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.

Moving forward and exercising faith is saying; God loves me. I will overcome. I will walk by faith and not by sight.

No matter where we are on the spectrum, we are on this journey together, so let’s have grace for each other and for ourselves. With God’s grace, comfort and help, we will prevail.

It’s time for a fresh start. We need a fresh start. I would suggest that our fresh start begin with the prayer of all prayers, the Lord’s prayer;

After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.

(Matthew 6:9-13)

Our fresh start can also begin with some healthy, positive thinking to displace some of our negative thinking. For this let us turn to the healing Word of God; “My heart is overflowing with a good theme; …” (Psalms 45:1NKJ)

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

(Philippians 4:8)

And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

(Romans 12:2)

I would like to suggest that as we now go into quoting a lot of scripture that You meditate on these healing scriptures. Perhaps write them out and even memorize some of them. Also pray them back to God or let them be the basis for further prayer. That is what I am trying to do on my healing journey.

One large part being transformed in our thinking is uprooting deep-seated strongholds of rejection that we all have. Along life’s journey we have been rejected many times by friends, family, people we respect, authority figures and enemies. This has affected and impacted us more than we think. After experiencing rejection from others, we then project their rejection responses on others, who may not have rejected us in the same way. We even may project these responses onto God, even though He has not treated us this way.

Deep-seated rejection my trace all the way back to the womb in cases where a child was not wanted.The child in the womb becomes aware of this rejection even though it was not spoken and they have not yet been born. Often rejection runs in the family. Without intending to do so, parents speak their own self-rejection, which children pick up on and copy and then it gets copied again to the following generation in an ongoing cycle.Rejection is re-enforced by negative childhood experiences or negative rejection experiences at any age. This may also include traumatic experiences. This may also include emotional abuse, sexual abuse or spiritual abuse. This may include Father or mother wounds. This may include abandonment. This may include heartbreak experiences. (Mark Dejesus. Exposing the rejection Mindset, 31)All of these things and other things impress feelings of rejection onto us. Those impressions run deep and then resurface in our thoughts again and again. Overcoming all of this is a process and a journey of receiving God’s love and acceptance and letting it transform us. How do we do that? Let’s start by reading His word, then believe His word and also pray to Him. I am somewhere on this journey. How about you?

God greatly values and treasures you and I.

Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father.

But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.

Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.

(Matthew 10:29-31)

For the Lord will not cast off his people, neither will he forsake his inheritance.

(Psalm 94:14)

God loves us, His children.

Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: …

(1 John 3:1)

God is merciful;

“… Praise the Lord of hosts: for the Lord is good; for his mercy endureth for ever: …”

Jeremiah 33:11

Who is a God like unto thee, that pardoneth iniquity, and passeth by the transgression of the remnant of his heritage? he retaineth not his anger for ever, because he delighteth in mercy.He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea.

Micah 7:18-19

God is good to us.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,

To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you,

Who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.

(1 Peter 1:3-5)

Prayer: Heavenly Father I read that You have mercy and hope for me. I receive Your abundant mercy and lively hope. Thank You for reserving a place in heaven for me and for keeping me till the end.In Jesus’ name. Amen

Prayer: Heavenly Father I have internalized a lot of rejection in my life. I surrendering all of that to You and am asking you to heal me of this.I am learning and I accept that You are loving, merciful and good. I am learning that You greatly value me. I renounce the rejection that I previously received from others or even in the womb. I now receive Your healing love. Thank you. In Jesus name.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I choose life. I choose a new start. I choose Your upward trail out of the pit of despair and into the light of Your love. I also choose to believe Your healing word.In Jesus name.

One definition of mental health is “Grace and peace.” Grace and peace come from God our Father and from Jesus Christ and they really want us to have them. How do I know?

Romans 1:7 7 To all that be in Rome, beloved of God, called to be saints: Grace to you and peace from God our Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Corinthians 1:3 Grace be unto you, and peace, from God our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ.

2 Corinthians 1:2 Grace be to you and peace from God our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ.

Galatians 1:3 Grace be to you and peace from God the Father, and from our Lord Jesus Christ,

Ephesians 1:2 Grace be to you, and peace, from God our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ.

Philippians 1:2 Grace be unto you, and peace, from God our Father, and from the Lord Jesus Christ.

Colossians 1:2 To the saints and faithful brethren in Christ which are at Colosse: Grace be unto you, and peace, from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Thessalonians 1:1 Paul, and Silvanus, and Timotheus, unto the church of the Thessalonians which is in God the Father and in the Lord Jesus Christ: Grace be unto you, and peace, from God our Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ.

2 Thessalonians 1:2 Grace unto you, and peace, from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Timothy 1:2 Unto Timothy, my own son in the faith: Grace, mercy, and peace, from God our Father and Jesus Christ our Lord.

2 Timothy 1:2 To Timothy, my dearly beloved son: Grace, mercy, and peace, from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.

Titus 1:4 To Titus, mine own son after the common faith: Grace, mercy, and peace, from God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ our Saviour.

Philemon 1:3 Grace to you, and peace, from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Peter 1:2 Elect according to the foreknowledge of God the Father, through sanctification of the Spirit, unto obedience and sprinkling of the blood of Jesus Christ: Grace unto you, and peace, be multiplied.

There are more of these but I will stop there. Prayer:

My Heavenly Father and Lord Jesus Christ, You are the source of grace and peace. I believe that You want me to have them. I open myself up to receive them. Please pour into me and infuse and saturate me with Your healing grace and peace. And then multiply them. I receive them by faith in Jesus name.Thank You.

This is what God’s word says further about His grace;

And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

2 Corinthians 12:9

But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;)

Ephesians 2:4-5

Jesus wants us to experience His peace. We read;

Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

John 14:27

There remaineth therefore a rest to the people of God.

Hebrews 4:9-11

Prayer: Lord Jesus I receive Your peace. I choose to not be afraid. I choose to enter Your rest.Thank You for loving me.

Brother, sister do you feel weak? Being fainthearted is another word for being weak. God wants you to be comforted and encouraged;

Now we [a]exhort you, brethren, warn those who are [b]unruly, comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all.

(1 Thessalonians 5:14 NKJ version. Some translations use the word encourage for comfort. footnote [a] encourage [b] insubordinate or idle)

Prayer: Heavenly Father thank you for Your patience with me. I am fainthearted. I open myself up to receive your comfort and encouragement. Pour it into me. Thank You. In Jesus name.

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

(Matthew 11:28)

Prayer: Lord Jesus I am heavy laden with life, pressures and failures. I come to You to lay down this burden. I come to You for rest. Thank you for taking this burden and for being my rest.

Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, as His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue,

(2 Peter 1:2-3)

Prayer: Heavenly Father I would like it if grace and peace could be multiplied to me. All things that pertain to life and godliness have been made available to me through knowing You. I confess that I don’t know you very well but I would like to know You well. Cause me to know You well. I receive all things that pertain to life and godliness. Thank you. In Jesus name.

Prayer: Heavenly Father I don’t fully understand my struggles. Whatever part of this bondage is do to my own flesh, sins, unbelief, etc please forgive me for it. Scripture: “Who can understand his errors? Cleanse me from secret faults.” (Psalms 19:12) I am beginning to understand that a big part of my struggle is not me at all but rather intrusive thoughts that have been popping into my head. I have given too much attention to them. I have let them distract me. I repent from doing this and ask for Your help, which is critical for me to succeed and to reverse this pattern.Thank You that You have not given me a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. I receive that. Help me to take full advantage of that. I am learning more and more about Your grace and love for me. I allow these truths to wash over me and fill my thinking and my believing. Let it be, more and more.I have come to believe that Your grace is sufficient for me. Thank You. In Jesus name.

(2 Corinthians 12:9)

My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence; I shall not be moved.

(Psalm 62:5-6)

Concerning Jesus:

For in that He Himself has suffered, being [c]tempted, He is able to aid those who are tempted.

(Hebrews 2:18 New King James Version. Footnote [c] tested)

Prayer:My Heavenly Father and Lord Jesus Christ. I have chosen to follow You on the road to healing. I am not trusting in myself, but I am trusting in You. My expectation is from You. You are my rock. That aid and assistance that I just read about that You are able to give, I need that please. Give me patience for this journey. Thank you. In Jesus Name.

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:

Philippians 1:6

Prayer: Heavenly Father, You are committed to me for the long-term. I accept my healing journey for however long it takes. Thank you for your steadfast faithfulness towards me.Amen.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

(1 John 1:9)

Prayer:Heavenly Father I thank you that You are such a forgiving God. I need to be reminded of this. I choose to believe this. Your cleansing is wonderful. Help me to be forgiving to others who have wronged me. I choose to be. Thank you that the healing that You have begun in me, You will complete and that You keep working on me from my birth to my grave. Amen

Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself; but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come.

(John 16:13)

Prayer: Heavenly Father I am learning more and more how much I need You on this healing journey.The Holy Spirit which has been sent to comfort me, I also need Him to lead me into all truth. Please cause this to occur.Thank You in Jesus name.

I said earlier; Two important questions that everyone of us at some point have wondered are “Who am I?” and “Am I loved?” (Mark Dejesus, Exposing The Rejection Mindset, pg 17)Every Christian is a child of God and is deeply loved by God.

For thy Maker is thine husband; the Lord of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called.

Isaiah 54:5

Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you.

John 15:16

But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light;Which in time past were not a people, but are now the people of God: which had not obtained mercy, but now have obtained mercy.

1 Peter 2:9-10

Heavenly Father I have been reminded by these scriptures that You have chosen me. Please cause this truth to sink deep into my heart, mind and soul and transform my thinking and my believing. I surrender all of the rejection that I have previously received to You. Please replace rejection with recognition of Your love and acceptance of me. I am a part of the people of God and have obtained mercy .Thank you for loving and accepting me. In Jesus name.

God is faithful:

If we believe not, yet he abideth faithful: he cannot deny himself.

2 Timothy 2:13

For the Lord will not cast off his people, neither will he forsake his inheritance.

Psalm 94: 14

Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

Matthew 28:20

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:

Philippians 1:6

Heavenly Father I give all of my insecurity over to You. Your faithfulness to me provides me with all of the security that I need. I accept this. Your love provides me with all of the security that I need. I accept this. I choose to live more transparently and more vulnerably, for my own good, and so that others around me will gain the courage to do the same. I choose not to compare myself to anyone else but rather to just be who You made me to be.

My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.

My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand.

John 10:27-29

Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,

Jude 1:24

Be thou my strong habitation, whereunto I may continually resort: thou hast given commandment to save me; for thou art my rock and my fortress.

Psalms 71:3

Notwithstanding in this rejoice not, that the spirits are subject unto you; but rather rejoice, because your names are written in heaven.

Luke 10:20

Prayer: Heavenly Father, yes again,Your faithfulness to me provides me with all of the security that I need. I accept this. Your love provides me with all of the security that I need. I accept this. I choose to stand firm in who You say that I am. Thank you. In Jesus name.

We all need to hear words of love and affirmation. We need this more than we think. We also need to be speaking words of love and affirmation over others around us. For they need this too. This is especially true within a family relationship. Did you know that even Jesus needed this, was given this by His Heavenly Father and received it? At Jesus’s baptism the heavens above Him were opened, God’s Spirit descended and the voice of His Heavenly Father spoke out saying; “…This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.” (Matthew 3:17 ) This was God the Father affirming Jesus Christ, His son. This happened again at the transfiguration. Jesus was on a mountain with several of His disciples. A cloud encompassed Him and again the voice of His Heavenly Father; “… This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased; hear ye him.” (Matthew 17:5) If Jesus needed this kind of affirmation from His Heavenly Father, how much more do we need loving affirmation?

And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses;

Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, nailing it to his cross;

Colossians 2:13-14

Prayer: Lord Jesus thank You for dying for me. Thank You for forgiving me all of my trespasses.Thank you for blotting out the charges against me. I am so glad that I don’t have to earn this by my own efforts, but rather, it is a gift to me. I receive all of Your grace. In my relationship with You, lay down all burdens of self- performance, self-perfectionism and self-reliance and in their place, I trust in You. Amen

I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.

John 14:18

Heavenly Father help me to tear down all of the walls that I have erected in my heart. I surrender them to You. Now let Your love flood in and fill every spot and corner of my heart and life, even areas where I previously have been bound and where I previously have not known Your love. In all of these places, bring about change. Thank You. In Jesus name.

I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture.

The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

John 10:9-10

Ask:

And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son.

John 14:13

The scriptures teach us that for every Christian, God is our Father. Do you relate to God as your Father? One test that sheds some light on this question is, ask yourself who do you pray to most frequently? Is it Jesus or Your Heavenly Father? For myself, until recently, I prayed mostly to Jesus. I am not saying that there is something wrong with praying to Jesus, there isn’t. Yet I am realizing that my relationship with my Heavenly Father has been especially shallow. I am trying now to change that.

Jesus taught His disciples to pray to their Heavenly Father. When Jesus’ disciples asked Him how they should pray, He said;

After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.

Matthew 6:9

And in that day ye shall ask me nothing. Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, he will give it you.

John 16:23

Jesus taught His disciples to pray to their Heavenly Father. As I continue on my journey, I have become more intentional about praying to my Heavenly Father and now I do that more than I pray to Jesus. God is our Father, He is “Abba, Father.”

For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father.

Romans 8:15

I have received the Spirit of adoption and it is biblically appropriate for me to call God my Abba, Father.

Jesus prayed this way Himself, even in the garden of Gethsemane, just moments before His crucifixion.

And he said, Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt.

Mark 14:36

Prayer: Heavenly, Abba Father thank You for providing a path to good mental health. I know that this is a journey. I begin that journey with You. I am so thankful that You love me. I am so thankful that You are committed to me for the long-term. I take Your hand. You lead and I will follow. I receive all of the love, forgiveness, joy, peace, strength, grace and healing that I need from You. I will be patient as You unpack all of this one verse at a time and one prayer at a time. I love you. In Jesus name. Amen

Shawn Stevens

References

Bare, Alicia. The God Who Is Enough For People Under A ‘Never Enough Taskmaker: In Search Of A Biblical And Holistic Approach To Obsessive- Compulsive Disorder. A paper submitted to Dr. Philip Powers In Fulfillment Of The Requirements For Thesis Part Four: M6046B, 2025.

Dejesus, Mark. Experiencing God’s Love as Your Father. Turning Hearts Ministries, 2018.

Dejesus, Mark. Exposing The Rejection Mindset. Turning Hearts Ministries, 2018.

Dejesus, Mark. The OCD Healing Journey. Turning Hearts Ministries International, 2023.

Emlet, Michael R. “Scrupulosity: When doubts devour. Journal of Biblical Counselling 33, no 3 (January 1, 2019): 11- 40.

Emlet, Michael R. OCD Freedom for the Obsessive Compulsive. RLC Publishing, 2004.

Osborn, Iam M.D. Can Christianity Cure Obsessive Compulsive Disorder? Brazos Pres, 2008.

Scriptures taken from The King James Version.

Zion Christian Ministry

The personal website of Shaun and Ramona Stevens

SCRUPULOSITY – RELIGIOUS OCD